Paraphrase Activity

Wallerstein, Judith and Sandra Blakeslee. "Chapter 1: Happy Marriages, Do They Exist?" The Good Marriage. © 1995 by Judith S. Wallerstein and Sandra Blakeslee. Reprinted by permission of Ticknor & Fields/Houghton Mifflin Co. 16 & 18 Oct. 2007 <http://www.hachettebookgroupusa.com/books/32/0446672483/chapter_excerpt10952.html>

Sections from Text

"In the past twenty years, marriage in America has undergone a profound, irrevocable transformation, driven by changes in women's roles and the heightened expectations of both men and women. Without realizing it, we have crossed a marital Rubicon. For the first time in our history, the decision to stay married is purely voluntary. Anyone can choose to leave at any time—and everyone knows it, including the children. There used to be only two legal routes out of marriage —adultery and abandonment. Today one partner simply has to say,
for whatever reason, I want out." Divorce is as simple as a trip to the nearest courthouse.

"Each year two million adults and a million children in this country are newly affected by divorce. One in two American marriages ends in divorce, and one in three children can expect to experience their parents' divorce. This situation has powerful ripple effects that touch us all. The sense that relationships are unstable affects the family next door, the people down the block, the other children in the classroom. Feelings of intense anxiety about marriage permeate the consciousness of all young men and women on the threshold of adulthood. At every wedding the guests wonder, privately, will this marriage last? The bride and groom themselves may question why they should marry, since it's likely to break up.

"To understand how our social fabric has been transformed, think of marriage as an institution acted upon by centripetal forces pulling inward and centrifugal forces pulling outward. In times past the centripetal forces—law, tradition, religion, parental influence—exceeded those that could pull a marriage apart, such as infidelity, abuse, financial disaster, failed expectations, or the lure of the frontier. Nowadays the balance has changed. The weakened centripetal forces no longer exceed those that tug marriages apart."


Summary

The realities of divorce are very real. It is almost impossible to not know someone who has a direct connection to the divorce of their parents or has been divorced themselves. It is very sad that so many marriages are ended today over issues or problems that couples have dealt with and overcome for years. Divorce is just so easy. Not only do children fear the divorce of their parents, but young men and women fear that they, themselves, will one day experience the pain of a divorce. The strong ties that influenced couples to remain married are not as strong as they once were. Marriage difficulties have a stronger influence to pull couples apart than the strong ties which unite them.

Direct Quotes

"Each year two million adults and a million children in this country are newly affected by divorce. One in two American marriages ends in divorce, and one in three children can expect to experience their parents' divorce. "

This is an important statistic for my paper. I like the way that it is stated, it is very concise and effective.

"For the first time in our history, the decision to stay married is purely voluntary. Anyone can choose to leave at any time. ... There used to be only two legal routes out of marriage —adultery and abandonment. Today one partner simply has to say, for whatever reason, 'I want out.' Divorce is as simple as a trip to the nearest courthouse."

This is, again, so concise and straightforward. It is such such an abrupt, simple example of how simple it really is nowadays.


Paraphrase

"In times past the centripetal forces—law, tradition, religion, parental influence—exceeded those that could pull a marriage apart, such as infidelity, abuse, financial disaster, failed expectations, or the lure of the frontier. Nowadays the balance has changed. The weakened centripetal forces no longer exceed those that tug marriages apart."

A long time ago, marriage used to be held together by tradition, religion, parental influence, and the law. Today, marriages are easily dissolved by "infidelity, abuse, financial [problems], failed expectations," or the desire to explore on their own. They are not based on the ideals held so strongly by our ancestors.

"The sense that relationships are unstable affects the family next door, the people down the block, the other children in the classroom. Feelings of intense anxiety about marriage permeate the consciousness of all young men and women on the threshold of adulthood. At every wedding the guests wonder, privately, will this marriage last? The bride and groom themselves may question why they should marry, since it's likely to break up."

Divorce has long reaching affects, not only on those immediately involved, but also those indirectly involved. Everyone has been or is affected by divorce to some degree. It is a fear with which young men and women struggle, especially those who are contemplating marriage.